Monday, August 5, 2013

The Astonishing Conclusion of Nick Farrell's "Secret Chiefs Challenge"


by Alpha Omega Imperator
David Griffin

Today is August 5 and Nick Farrell's 
"Secret Chiefs Challenge" is officially over!

"If I can't catch the Secret Chiefs by August 5 ...
... they can't really exist! - Nick Farrell

Over the past month Nick Farrell, Chief of the Magical Order of Aurora Aureae and purveyor of occult fantasy novels, endowed our Golden Dawn community with a seemingly endless series of articles about the Golden Dawn's Secret Chiefs.


All of this was part of Farrell's "Secret Chiefs Challenge" in which our intrepid psychonaut challenged the Secret Chiefs to either appear to him by August 5, or consider themselves as non-existent.

During the month there was once or twice I could not resist poking a little fun at Nick, first off with the above image of Farrell acting like a dog chasing his tail.

I thought better of it the next day and took the blog post down. Low and behold, Farrell immediately stole my idea and published his own image of me chasing my tail!

Had it really come to this?

A commenter then pointed out how Farrell's entire "Secret Chiefs' Challenge" reminded her of a schoolyard. She wrote:
"I notice that Nick Farrell copied your dog chasing tail image, turned it around as though the joke was his own, then called YOU a tail chaser. Watch this video as it shows the "mature" mentality we are dealing with:

Another commenter then suggested that Nick Farrell is merely envious of the vast, traditional, supplemental Golden Dawn teachings and Magick recently released by the Secret Chiefs of the A.O.'s Third Order, integrated into all grades from Neophyte up. You can read testimonials regarding these teachings HERE.

She wrote:
"The whole [present Secret Chiefs debate] boils down to: 
"Farrell wants your bike!"

Now that Farrell's "Secret Chiefs Challenge" is officially over, I must admit I never in a million years imagined what a fantasy novel Nick would invent to conclude his "challenge." Farrell came up with an ending worthy of any soap box game show!

Let's see if we can wrap this up by revealing - once and for all - what Nick Farrell has been hiding all along behind The "Secret Chiefs Challenge's" "Door Number One," "Door Number Two," and "Door Number Three."


Behind Door Number One, we find Nick Farrell's original story:

"Anyone who believes in Secret Chiefs is as nutty as a loon."

Then, in a fasciating flip-flop, behind Door Number Two, we discover Nick Farrell's next story:


"The Secret Chief of the Golden Dawn ...
... is really the Archangel Raphael."


Oops! Does this mean that Nick Farrell has been a secret channeller of New Age Secret Chiefs all along?

Farrell The Magnificent

And now - Behind Door Number Three ...



Ta-Ta-Ta-Ta ...



We discover Nick Farrell's latest and greatest story ...

The Secret Chief of Nick Farrell's MOAA, is none other than the mysterious ...


Count of St. Germain!

That's right ...

Allegedly hundreds of years old, the Count of St. Germain is known in New Age and B.O.T.A. circles as Master Racoczi. Nick Farrell, following in the footsteps of Paul Foster Case, today claims that he too has met with Master R., albeit in a coffee shop in Rome near St. Peter's Cathedral.

So as not to be easily recognized, the good Count masked his thick Transylvanian accent and pretended instead to be Corsican. According to Farrell, Master Racoczi has been hiding for the past hundred or so years on the island of Corsica, living with his boyfriend, Guiseppe Balsamo, also apparently immortal, and better known as Count Cagliostro.

Giuseppe Balsomo (Count Cagliostro)
boyfriend of St. Germain on Corsica

Master R. did let on, however, that not only is he ...
  • Secret Chief of both B.O.T.A. and Farrell's M.O.A.A. but he is also...
  • Geheim Haupt of the Illuminati
  • Magus Sublimissimus of SRIA
  • Grand Chancellor the Order of Memphis and Myriam
  • Secret Supreme Master of the United Grand Lodge of England
  • Caput Draconis of the Osiris Order
  • Grand Phallus of the Subterranean Order of Set
  • All Seeing Eye of the Grand Orient of Horus and, of course...
  • Secret Grand Poobah of the Royal Order of Buffalos!


Personally, I think Nick Farrell has missed his calling. Why is Nick still wasting time writing occult fantasy novels dressed up as history, when he could already be a rich man inventing stories for David Icke!

M.O.A.A. Secret Chief & his Sock Puppet


The diffetence between Nick Farrell's order and the Alpha Omega could not be more clear. Whereas Farrell's Secret Chief has not produced anything by hot air and wild stories about fancy titles, the Secret Chiefs of the Alpha Omega have already put their money where their mouth is ...

... providing vast amounts of additional Golden Dawn MAGICK and teachings that have been integrated throughout our entire curriculum, even in the Neophyte grade!

This is real magick and profound, traditional G.D.teachings - not just empty promises.

Click HERE to explore our Outer Order, undergraduate level Magical training program, the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn!




8 comments:

  1. Great satire. Thanks for this piece. I am sure that the trolls without a sense of humor won't get it though!

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  2. I find it interesting how he goes from saying they don't exist to proclaiming that he not only met a Secret Chief but found the Head honcho of 'em all. lol Very laughable... in a "don't expect to be taken serious" type of way.

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  3. Fun-tastik:-)

    Blessings to all brothers of the Light.

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  4. I think you should actually read what he wrote, not what you want him to have written. Your head is so far up your own arse you should be able to see daylight - but you would probably take that to be the sun shining out of your arse instead. You are a complete and utter dick, full of bullshit,

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  5. Who is nick farrel? Why does he think I read his messages/challenges? Why would I reveal myself to him? )O+->

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  6. On 8/9/13, Peregrin Wildoak wrote:

    "There is a stupid fucking idea out that there that just 'cos we're Pagans we have to believe in organic food and 'natural' medicine and three-toed sloth urine as a cure for all manners of ill. It is nonsense, and as you say, dangerous."

    Who is "we" , Ke-mo sah-bee? Why do you and Farrell keep pretending to be Pagan? You admitted on your blog that you converted to Anglican Christianity, just like Farrell swore the same to the Order of the Rose and Cross? Why do you guys go on trying to deceive people that you are Pagan?

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  7. they love you ..that all.. love hate passion story all have there drawn back ..it's love ..lol

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